I now know Jesus as my Savior. I didn’t before, at least not in this way. I never could understand why Jesus died and what his death does for me and how it saves me. But yesterday the light shone clearly. It came through words from my old mentor Diogenes Allen, words I had read before. But the full import of them didn’t strike me until now.

Our struggle with evil — a struggle through which our true life is beginning to emerge — is only possible because we are spared the full effects of evil. We are spared being placed at the greatest distance from God. God has not allowed us to experience the complete absence of God’s Spirit. We can make a journey from evil toward God because we have been spared an exposure to the consequences of our thoughts and actions and inactions that would completely destroy us. We could not bear what only the Son could bear.

In his death, Christ took upon himself the terrible consequences of sin and evil, utter alienation from God. I can make my journey to God only because Christ has shielded me in this way. He is like the mother who died protecting her children from the tornado, covering them with her own body. Christ died, allowing me to live into God. This is how Christ saves me. As I realized this truth on Wednesday afternoon at two o’clock, my heart warmed with joy and peace. Christ is my Savior.